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"I felt a Funeral in my brain"
Almost unknown as a poet in her lifetime, Emily Dickinson is now recognized as one of the greatest poets who used many different devices to develop her poetry, which made her style quiet unique. A glance at one of her poems may lead one to believe that she was quiet and a simple poet. The poetry of Dickinson attempt to romanticize nature and speak of death and loneliness that is not only in her poems, but also in her life. "I felt a funeral in my brain". The use of words associated with death gives the poem an ominous and dark karma. At the beginning of this poem the feelings of grief and pain are evident. Throughout the rest of the poem, there is a strong sense that the speaker needs to make a choice between a world full of trouble and pain or a heaven that brings solitude and peace.
In the first stanza, Dickinson uses the metaphor of a funeral to represent the speaker's sense that a part of her is dying, that is, her reason is being overwhelmed by the irrationality of the unconscious. "I felt the funeral in my brain" (li 1) a funeral is an appropriate image for this ordeal. The funeral marks the passage from one state to another (Life to death, sanity to insanity). Also a funeral is a formal event, whose rules and procedures suggest control and order. The control and order implicit in a funeral contrast ironically with the lack of control and loss of rationality that threaten the speaker. However, the poet is not observing the funeral but is feeling it. She is both observer of the funeral and participant, indicating that the Self is divided.
The mourners are a metaphor to express her pain, "And mourners, to and fro," (li ). Their treading indicates a pressure that is pushing her down. "Kept beating, beating, till I thought/ my mind was going numb" (lis 7-8). The speaker has a momentary impression that reason "sense" is escaping or being lost. The pressure of the treading is reasserted with the repetition "beating, beating." This time her mind, the source of reasoning, goes "numb", a further deterioration in her condition.
One can trace the process of the speaker's loss rationality in stanza three and four. The last two lines of stanza four assess her condition, "And I and silence some strange race/ Wrecked, solitary, here."(lis 15-16), she sees herself as wrecked and solitary. Her descent into irrationality separates her from other human beings, making her a member of "some strange race". Her alienation and inability to communicate are indicated by her being enveloped by silence. This is also shows Dickinson in an in-between state of sanity and insanity. She finds herself in a strange place with a "strange race" not knowing where to go or not to do.
In conclusion, as in all poems, the true meaning is always deeper than the meaning of the words. Each of the poems of Dickinson concerns themselves with realms of consciousness with the isolated nature of existence. For this reason, they are intensely personal as they focus on the inner experience. These passing moment of intense insight are well depicted in many of her poems. And "I felt a funeral in my brain" is one of them.
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